THE OTHER SIDE OF A SHEREHE (PARTY) GONE TOO FAR

 

THE OTHER SIDE OF A “SHEREHE” (PARTY) GONE TOO FAR

The work week is winding down.

It’s Friday.

School is closing.

A party is coming soon.

It’s someone’s birthday.

Seeing a trend?

Who doesn’t love a party and a reason to make merry? For Kenyan youths, there’s nothing other than the “sherehe” moment to scheme out their most crazy dance moves, outfits and an excuse to swerve on the edge of sobriety.

If you haven’t been seen or appeared on a social media post or story on a night out, then you just didn’t have fun or you are hiding from your other half. Social media posts are the paparazzi for the night, and if you are at home, you are simply using data or WIFI to be told, what you are missing.

Arranging a big group of people for laughs is not a thing to be missed, unless it is for valid reason. Even in small groups, the laughter is still warming to the heart.

Let’s take this a bit of a step back and see our party fellows. You know them. They come in a variety of characteristics and mannerisms that we can’t forget.

That person who blacks out after the first sip and is left in the car or room in a house party.

That person who has money to buy the whole stock of the bar.

The guy struggling to survive on a budget on a night out.

That person hoping to look for a wife/husband at the social gathering.

The number of various characters are numerous enough to even fill on a casting on a TV Show.

The richer the diversity, the more the fun amongst the group or crowd. However, we always have those people who take it tooooo far. Like “What happened last night” or “How did I end up here” too far.

 

 

It usually starts at that group you always hang with. You’ve collected the camaraderie, like shells on a seashore, and the next best thing everyone just wants is a great hang out or a particular spot to hang out and beat stories until the night changes moons.

Making merry goes sooo well, and the light headedness of the indulgence in various brews and inhalants, creating room for the comedy of a lifetime. Then, as fate would have it, there’s our friend who is often left at the scene, with clothes having changed colour, one shoe missing and probably, one wrong text, sent during the night, that’s led to 20 missed calls.

The joker of the group and entertainer on a night out. Filling everyone with memories and near crime offences to get everyone to hurdle in a police station.

They often always need help to get from point A to point B and at times do not get to their residence. Call after call, they are there with more requests to be assisted in one way or another from the scene.

In our Kenyan society, we know this person as “Mlevi (drunkard) or “Mraibu (addict)”. Either disturbing the bouncer and bartenders, when the sun rises up, and everyone has cleared the bar or oversharing and venting all sorts personal stories to one’s amazement. Part-time con man, when low on funds for a few fixes and a regular for law enforcement authorities. They are presently seen making bizarre actions under the influence.

Most of their actions are mostly seen from the only perspective of their lack of sobriety. However, our local person who loses their sobriety every now and then, have a background they come from.

Their behaviour is often largely seen as irresponsible and fails to have many understand how a fully grown adult might behave like a teenager entering a club for their first time. More so, either having a family, thriving business or work life and financially sound.

Why doesn’t our “Mlevi or Mraibu” just grow up and leave the experimental phases of life away? Their behaviour often falls under the umbrella of substance use disorder.

Substance use disorder, in a general sense, can be defined as a disease that involves the uncontrollable use of particular legal or illegal substances beyond healthy or manageable standards.

 

Among the common symptoms that are portrayed by the disorder are:

-      Urges to use the drug frequently within various times in the day.

-      Not having any other thoughts, apart from using the drug.

-      Taking more of the drug to illicit the same effect or more each time.

-      Making sure you maintain or are able to get a good supply of the drug.

-      Spending money on the drug, even when funds are unavailable.

-      Inability to meet work or school obligations as well as decrease social interactions, in order to facilitate the time and effort for drug usage.

-      Continual use of the drug, even in the midst of affects to one’s health or psychological well-being.

-      Spending a good deal of time getting, using and recovering from the drug.

-      Driving and partaking in risky activities under the influence of the drug.

-      Failing in attempts at getting to stop using the drug.

-      Experiencing of withdrawal symptoms when away from the drug.

 

Various substances affect the bodies physiology, differently, depending on the chemical structure of the drug, and how they interact with the brains nervous system, therefore presenting specific effects from the individual.

The substances range from 10 classes of drugs such as alcohol, caffeine, cannabis, hallucinogens, inhalants; opioids, sedatives, hypnotics and anxiolytics, stimulants (amphetamine-type substances, cocaine, and other stimulants), tobacco; and other (or unknown) substances.

However, all drugs often taken in excess, act in direct activation of the brain reward system, and often the felling of a “high”. Furthermore, those with lower levels of self-control, which may reflect impairments of brain inhibitory mechanisms, are predisposed to having a substance use disorder.

Our friend who gives us these experiences, filling our gallery of photos on our phones, that we share in the group chat for a laugh, may never have the ways to verbalize what they go through. Some of the indications that our friend isn’t just making jolly and is having a serious condition could be:

-      Neglected school or work, and having increasingly poor performance in them

-      Lack of energy, motivation and significant weight loss

-      Lack of interest in proper grooming and hygiene

-      Significant changes of social behaviour and moving more towards isolation and disruption of relationships with family and friends

-      Sudden requests of large amounts of money without proper reason, and the sudden disappearance of valuables and money within the household

So, our local friend under the influence, may or may have not opened up yet and all they tell you are the memories they had or hidden secrets not relevant to the topic, when you meet up for your regular or not so regular amount of times at your local spot. The reasons or causes why some may be the friend that take sherehe too far, could be:

-      Predisposed genetics within the family: This could possibly mean that there is a predisposition within the shared traits passed on through offspring that increases the chances of becoming a drug addict

-      Peer pressure: It often happens as a result from influence from peer groups that one involves themselves with. Everyone hurdles to satisfy the urge to fit in, especially for young adolescents who are none the wiser, in terms of making decisions of life and from there a behaviour of dependency to a drug, sprouts out.

-      A co-occuring mental disorder: Certain mental disorders such as depression, anxiety, ADHD and PTSD, predispose one towards the usage of drugs. The usage of drugs to self-medicate when dealing with these mental disorders, is often the case.

-      Life experiences and environment: Intense experiences of life such as trauma, stress, grief or loss, can be pressurizing and the repercussions may lead one to believing that there is no other answer than to indulge in the relief or “high” drugs give. Despite temporary relief, the long-term usage of the drugs may have permanent harmful effects to the person

Hopefully our friend gains the strength to be able to overcome these reasons and be able to talk. However, in the case that, they’ve beeped your more times than you can count, to meet up at the usual local spot, check out for these signs to know if you need to swap that time for a visit to the doctor. These could be:

-      Possibly could have overdosed

-      Shows changes in consciousness

-      Difficulty breathing

-      Experiencing seizures and convulsions

-      Possible signs of a heart attack such as chest pain and pressure

-      Any troubling physical or psychological reaction to the use of the drug

We still want the best for our friend. I mean, for all they’ve been through what’s not relieving than being there for a friend? Sure, they push the needle on celebrating an occasion too far, and even at odd hours or inappropriate times, they call for money and cause turbulent and overwhelming burden on some of those around them. It would be good to still be able to hang around and not hear drastic news, right? So, what does help and recovery look like for them?

Often, it is usually a struggle for the friend to be able to get to a place to finally accept they have a problem. However, the silver lining is that, it is treatable.

Like any other treatment for a chronic condition such as heart disease or asthma, the treatment for addiction is not a cure but a way to manage the condition. This enables the individual to be able to counteract the addiction’s disruptive effects on their brain and regain control of their lives.

This often starts with getting a proper diagnosis from the psychiatrist and possibly beginning medication, that assists in detoxification of the drug abuser’s body and rehabilitation, which could include psychotherapy and counselling.

From the various reasons, our friend was not able to share, they find the proper spaces to be able to express and get the answers they need without bias and marginalization. A big part of their rehabilitation of is being able to address the whole person and reintegrate them back to society.

Yes, even, as you see your buddy, perform all acts of mannerisms when under the influence, you are also a crucial part to their recovery. Loved ones and friends are encouraged to participate in psychoeducation, which involves helping the educate about the disorder the individual has, as well as ways to encourage and accept them as people who have a disorder and not who they are.

Being able to have communities where fellow recovering patients are present, is helpful in being able to assist the individual in learning they are not alone and have others they can express their trials towards.

In conclusion, when we have that friend, who takes things too far at a sherehe, lets have a look a bit closer before we edge them on to down another bottle or inhale another type of drug. Until next time. Keep checking on each other.